Moving Through Change – Part 4

At the end of the last post, I talked about the importance of acceptance as you navigate the third stage of the change cycle.

That acceptance is part of what will move you through the next stage, ENLIGHTENMENT.

Today, I want to talk about what it looks like, practically, to drop into acceptance and how it moves you through the enlightenment stage.

No judgment

Acceptance begins by releasing judgment. Yes, I know I said it in the last post, and it’s worth repeating here, no judgment. No judgment of yourself, others, or even the stranger on the internet who is annoying you for whatever reason. If judgment is present, truth will not emerge. The two cannot exist together. To find the truths you need to move through the ENLIGHTENMENT stage, you have to let go of judgment.

Feeling overwhelmed by all the things? No judgment. Feeling angrier than you can put into words? No judgment. Thinking you “should” be better, have it all figured out, or handle it better? No judgment.

No judgment. When you don’t judge, you can allow what is, and inevitably, the path forward will reveal itself. Maybe not the entire path, at the very least, though the next step will reveal itself.

No judgment. Say it as often as you need to so you can take the next steps forward.

Feel your feelings

Are you starting to see a pattern yet? We talked about this in the last two stages, and here they are again. Moving through change is not linear. You’ll move in and out of the stages, and the emotions stage is one that you’ll visit often. Feel them when they do. It’s the only way forward.

Remember, they have information for you. By feeling them, you can access that information and with it, there are often aha’s or new insights that bring about enlightenment. So feel your feelings.

Find a good mantra

I find mantras to be a useful tool for the ENLIGHTEN stage because they help with dropping into acceptance.

I’ve used a few over the years. One that I find useful for allowing this stage to unfold is “that’s not what’s in front of me right now”.  

This particular mantra does two things. One, it keeps me in THIS moment rather than looking at the past with regret or into the future with worry. It also serves as a reminder that I am here. I’m surviving this thing I’m moving through, which can be useful, particularly when the change is a hard one.  

Mantras work best when they are short phrases that are easily repeatable. If they’re too long, you spend too much time trying to remember what to say, which defeats the purpose. Find a short set of words that work for you and use them here.

Use affirmations

While a mantra can be an affirmation, I use them differently. Mantras drop me into the present; affirmations help me to imagine a different possibility.

I used to struggle with affirmations. I could say “I’m enough” all I want, but there was always a part of my brain that was rolling its eyes at me. The part of me that didn’t believe it was strong. To overcome this, I added “what if” to the front of the affirmation.

Instead of “I’m enough”, I would say “What if I am enough?”. The “what if” bypasses the judgment and eye-rolling my brain wants to do.

The important thing here is not trying to answer the “what if” question. Instead, it’s simply allowing for the possibility of this affirmation. Trust me when I tell you it works.

Enlightenment

As you utilize these various tools for dropping into acceptance, a light will begin to emerge in the darkness. It may not be fireworks or neon flashing lights. Sometimes, it’s a quiet realization. A shift in perspective. A sense of peace where there used to be pressure.

That’s the ENLIGHTENMENT stage.

Maybe you start saying “no” more. Or you catch a critical thought before it spirals. Maybe you realize, “This isn’t my fault.”

Those moments matter. They are signs you’re integrating what the change is teaching you.

Honor them. Celebrate them. Let them remind you you’re growing.

The free Moving Through the Change Cycle guide walks you through recognizing and expanding these moments of insight. Download it here.

And if you feel ready for more direct support, click here to schedule a free, no-obligation call with me. I’m here anytime you’re ready.

Cheering you on,